Crash bang wallop

36. 9am. Top deck, towards the back on the left.

We can learn a lot from the Greeks. I tuned in to a pair of thirty-something women across from me, discussing one of their boyfriends. Well, I say discussing; one of them was definitely holding forth:

‘I love him, really. We love each other. It’s just he has such a temper on him. He slams his hand down on the kitchen table and everything jumps, you know? He’s very jealous -‘ she flicked her luxuriant hair – ‘he thinks I’m always cheating on him. I tell him why not, to wind him up, you know what I mean?’

She guffawed. She seemed remarkably relaxed for someone with a potentially unhinged partner.

‘Sometimes we shout at each other, really loud so the neighbours complain… But it’s no big deal, we’re just letting off steam right?’

Her friend was beginning to look a little pale.

‘The other day he bought a set of plates home. They were plain white, so ugly, I told him why did you buy these? He has no idea. So I smashed them all!’

Oh my days. I thought that was just for weddings. The woman beamed.

‘It’s not the first time, it’s a great sound don’t you think? It’s really satisfying. He doesn’t mind, he just goes and buys some more. It’s hilarious! I think I’ve gone through four sets already.’

Right! Anyway, thanks for the Olympics, Greece. Back to normality now.

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